Tapioca in the instant pot

 This is going to be an evolving recipe for a while until I figure out what actually works

1/3 cup tapioca pearls

3 cups milk

1/3 cup sugar

Put this all in the instant pot and pressure cook for 6 minutes, then do natural pressure release. This always takes way longer than I think so expect this to take ~an hour to be ready to eat

1 tsp caramel flavour

Pinch of salt 

1 egg

Put your instant pot in sauté mode and get ready to whisk. I normally beat my egg slightly in a bowl or my big measuring cup that’s already dirty for milk, then temper that egg by adding a bit of the hot liquid and whisking, then a bit more, then a bit more, until I see some steam coming off my egg mix. The you put that in the instant pot and whisk until it thickens up some. I usually like my tapioca to be a medium consistency but it will thicken up more as it cools 

Add in caramel and salt and whisk that in, then eat that delicious tapioca

Nicole’s Famous Chili

 1lb ground beef

~3-4 strips of bacon (optional) 

2 cloves garlic, minced

1 onion, diced

2 celery stalks, chopped finely

1 pepper, whatever color you like or have, diced

Mushrooms, however many you want, sliced

1-2 Jalapeños, finely diced (optional)

2 cups tomato sauce

1 cup broth - I usually make my own turkey stock but I usually have something on hand to use up

1 can brown beans in tomato sauce 

1 can black beans (not the gigantic one)

1 can diced tomatoes (not the gigantic one)

1 can Pineapple tidbits

2-4 tbsp Chili powder

1.5 tsp cumin

Pepper flakes to taste

Salt and pepper to taste

Jalapeño sugar/sugar (optional)

Brown your meat in a nice big pot, use a little oil if you need to but usually with ground beef/bacon you don’t need much. 

Add onion and cook until soft, add garlic till fragrant.

Throw in al those vegetables and cook for about 3-4 minutes till they’re slightly softened. Add all your cans of stuff and if you only have gogancitic beans and tomatoes, just don’t put them completely in. ❤️ U, little Tupperwares! Simmer uncovered for 1 hour

Add spices and simmer 30 mins with the lid on. Taste to see if the tomato base is too acidic and add a bit of sugar if it is. Adjust spice level to taste, then serve with nice fresh bread, tortilla chips, cornbread - whatever you like. It’s Chili! Use up anything in your fridge/pantry with abandon man. 

Charred Cabbage with Dill Cream

I got this recipe from one of those cards you randomly come across in the grocery store, and it has since disappeared from the internet, so I'm publishing it here so I will always have it.  I originally wanted something for when I buy a cabbage, because I never go through a full one before it gets sad and soft, and it is a surprisingly great recipe.

1/2 large green cabbage
1 tbsp vegetable oil
3 tbsp butter
1 tsp salt

1/4 cup mayonnaise
1/3 cup sour cream
1 1/2 tbsp fresh dill
1 tbsp fresh parsley
1/4 tsp cayenne
1/4 tsp celery seed
1/4 tsp garlic powder
1/4 tsp salt

Put all ingredients for dill cream in a bowl and whisk together until smooth. Place in the fridge and let those flavours meld until ready to use

Preheat grill to medium heat. Coat the cut side of cabbage in vegetable oil. Place on the grill cut side down and allow to char for at least 20 minutes. The cabbage will look burnt and blackened from the char grilling - this is a good thing!  Gently flip and grill for another 20 minutes. Remove from heat.
Double up two sheets of tinfoil and place cabbage in the centre, cut side up. Top with butter and salt. Tightly seal the edges of the tinfoil to create a sealed packet. Place on top rack of grill for 30 minutes or until tender.
Let cool in foil for 15 minutes before cutting. Cut into wedges or two-inch chunks. Drizzle with dill cream, or if you are like me, dip it in that delicious sauce, dip dip dip.

Making a mean chocolate cake shouldn't be so hard

I'm transcribing this pretty directly from Add a Pinch's best chocolate cake recipe ever, since I tried to make the best chocolate cake ever today and can't even see the text due to all the autoplay videos that kept scrolling through. What the hell, man?

The recipe is damn good though

Ingredients

• 1 cups all-purpose flour
• 1 cups sugar
• 3/8 cup unsweetened cocoa powder (1/4 cup + 2 tbsp)
• 1 teaspoon baking powder
• 3/4 teaspoons baking soda
• 1/2 teaspoon salt
• 1/2 teaspoon espresso powder
• 1/2 cup milk buttermilk, almond, or coconut milk
• 1/4 cup vegetable canola oil, or melted coconut oil
• 1 large egg
• 1 teaspoon vanilla extract
• 1/2 cup boiling water
• Chocolate Buttercream Icing

Instructions

• Preheat oven to 350º F. Prepare an 8-inch square baking dish by spraying with baking spray or buttering and lightly flouring.

For the chocolate cake:

• Add flour, sugar, cocoa, baking powder, baking soda, salt and espresso powder to a large bowl. Whisk through to combine.
• Add milk, vegetable oil, eggs, and vanilla to flour mixture and mix together on medium speed until well combined. Reduce speed and carefully add boiling water to the cake batter until well combined.
• Distribute cake batter evenly in the prepared cake pan. Bake for 30-35 minutes, until a toothpick or cake tester inserted in the center of the chocolate cake comes out clean.
• Remove from the oven and allow to cool for about 10 minutes, remove from the pan and cool completely.
• Ice cake with Chocolate Buttercream Icing.

Pumpkin Apple Streusel Muffins

Ingredients

• 2 ½ cups all-purpose flour
• 2 cups white sugar
• 1 tablespoon pumpkin pie spice (I don’t know what this is, so I combined ginger, cinnamon, nutmeg and allspice)
• 1 teaspoon baking soda
• ½ teaspoon salt
• 2 eggs, lightly beaten
• 1 cup canned pumpkin puree
• ½ cup vegetable oil
• 2 cups peeled, cored and chopped apple

• 2 tablespoons all-purpose flour
• ¼ cup white sugar
• ½ teaspoon ground cinnamon
• 4 teaspoons butter

Directions

1. Preheat oven to 350 degrees F (175 degrees C). Lightly grease 18 muffin cups.
2. In a large bowl, sift together 2 ½ cups all-purpose flour, 2 cups sugar, pumpkin pie spice, baking soda and salt. In a separate bowl, mix together eggs, pumpkin and oil. Add pumpkin mixture to flour mixture; stirring just to moisten. Fold in apples. Spoon batter into prepared muffin cups.
3. In a small bowl, mix together 2 tablespoons flour, ¼ cup sugar and ½ teaspoon cinnamon. Cut in butter until mixture resembles coarse crumbs. Sprinkle topping evenly over muffin batter.
4. Bake in preheated oven for 35 to 40 minutes, or until a toothpick inserted into a muffin comes out clean.

PS, don’t mind my poor photography.

Break-Up Sandwich

Best sandwich ever - prosciutto ham, pear slices, fresh parmesan cheese and cracked black pepper on a croissant.  Try this.

  

Nicole's Famous Coconut Cookies

I am an idiot, because I refuse to do my dishes when my apartment is this hot, but it doesn’t stop me from turning on the oven for 30 mins while I whip up some cookies.

1 ¼ cups all-purpose flour (I used a little less, see note)
½ tsp baking soda
¼ tsp salt
½ cup butter
½ cup packed brown sugar
½ cup white sugar
1 egg
1 tsp vanilla
1 1/3 cups flaked coconut

1. Preheat oven to 350 degrees F (175 degrees C.) Combine the flour, baking soda, and salt; set aside.
2. In a medium bowl, cream the butter, brown sugar, and white sugar until smooth. Beat in the egg and vanilla until light and fluffy. Gradually blend in the flour mixture, then mix in the coconut. This dough will be sticky! That's what makes them so flat and chewy in the middle. 
3. Drop dough by tablespoonfuls onto an ungreased cookie sheet. Cookies should be about 3 inches apart.
4. Bake for 13-15 minutes in the preheated oven, or until lightly toasted. Cool on wire racks.

I discussed this with my sister, and she suggested the way to make cookies that kind of flatten out and turn into nice big ones is to use a little more butter or a little less flour.  I am an overachiever of some kind, so I did both, but not by a lot.  Maybe a teaspoon more butter and a teaspoon less flour.  It sure worked though, these cookies are both my favorite and my most-requested cookies

Homemade Pizza

I was too lazy to go out for food last night, plus I am trying to save money by eating in.  So I looked through my cupboards and saw yeast and I looked through my fridge and saw tomatoes, and I decided to whip up a couple of pizzas.  No, being too lazy to order a pizza and deciding to make one from scratch doesn’t make any sense.  Don’t worry about it.

My old friend Lisa had given me some recipes from her high school home ec classes, and pizza was one of them.  I have been carrying this recipe around for probably 5 years.  The first (and last) time I tried making it, though, things didn’t work out so well.  So I was determined to figure it out this time.

Here is the dough recipe, btw.  It was really good, except I feel like I could have used more salt.
1 tbsp yeast
1 tsp sugar
1 cup hot water - like, as hot of water as will come out of your tap
2 tbsp vegetable oil
½ tsp salt (like I said, I will use more next time!)
2 ½ cups flour

Dissolve the yeast and sugar in the warm water.  It should take about 5 minutes, according to this recipe, but the last time I believe that’s where I went wrong, and this time I went and cleaned my bathroom in the meantime, so that usually takes a bit longer than 5 minutes.
Add vegetable oil, salt and flour and beat until it comes together, then knead until “smooth and elastic."  This makes sense once you start kneading. Let stand 10 mins.

I also made the sauce from old tomatoes, onion and orange pepper, plus a shitload of basil and oregano and some garlic powder.  I realized I hadn’t bought garlic in a while, so I went to grab it, and it had turned into its own powder.  Yuck.  I just cooked the vegetables and spices (and salt and pepper, duh) in a bit of olive oil and some water, till they made a sauce of sorts.

Also, I grated a bunch of cheese and put most of it below the toppings.  I hear this is the correct and more pretentious way of making pizza, so I figured, why not?

My only topping was pineapple, because I love pineapple on pizza, as well as the fact that I used up all my vegetables making sauce.  Then I put any remaining cheese on top.  Bake for 20 mins at 425, broil if you want the top browned, which I didn’t and it browned fairly nicely anyway.



Also, I am getting back into this cooking things, but one thing I’m not into is this:

Dishes again today, looks like.

Grilled Vegetable Pita Pizza

You need:

Olive oilGarlic
Basil
Salt & pepper
Zucchini
Tomato
Green Onion
Goat cheese
Pita






 
Make a nice soup of oil, garlic, basil and salt & pepper.  You should probably do this in a giant bowl, but I only have large bowls, so I had to cut my green onion in half to douse it.  Slice zucchini thickly and on an angle (ideally too large to fit through the grill, since those suckers get slippery when using metal tongs and covered in oil.)  I always use grape/cherry tomatoes because I am not in love with sliced tomatoes, but if you use a regular size tomato, just slice it up thick.



Here’s where my pictures start to suck, because my camera said the battery was too low for flash but it still had half the bar?  Stupid phone.  Anyway, I bring the bowl of oil-soaked vegetables out to the grill with me and put on the zucchini, then the tomatoes, then the onion; close the lid and use your little brush to paint the rest of the lovely oil mix over your bare pita.  Turn everything over, and you should have some lovely grill marks on your zucchini and onion by now, tomatoes should be getting kind of orange-r as they cook.


Once your vegetables are cooked, put them on your plate or in that bowl again (a little extra olive oil never hurt anyone), then grill your pita for just a minute on each side.  IT IS VERY EASY TO BURN A PITA BREAD ON A BBQ SO NOT TOO LONG.  I mean, it still tastes good and I have always used it anyway, but today I got the perfect cook - crispy, sizzly, smoky but not burnt.
 

 Bring everything inside and start assembling:
1. slice zucchinis into quarters or whatever.  They’re really quite large pieces.
2. cut up your green onions with scissors (or a knife, but they get a little soggy)
3. I slice my tomatoes in half because I am a nut, but do what you want.
4. throw it all on top of that pita
5. top with goat cheese
6. cut in as many pieces as you want




Eat that shit up, what are you, nuts?  (Bring a paper towel, experience talking)

Delightful White Raspberry Muffins

I know I should make healthier muffins, and I sometimes do, but sometimes a good sweet muffin is the best thing ever. As you might notice from the pictures, this is another different counter top, so yes, I've moved again. Also, my sister took me to Costco and I bought about 600,000 raspberries there.

2 cups all-purpose flour
1 cup sugar
3 teaspoons baking powder
1/2 teaspoon salt
2 eggs
1 cup half-and-half cream
1/2 cup vegetable oil
1 teaspoon lemon extract (I didn't have any of this, so I think I used 1/2 almond and 1/2 vanilla)
1 cup fresh or frozen unsweetened raspberries (If you use frozen, don't thaw them first)


In a large bowl, combine the flour, sugar, baking powder and salt.














In another bowl, combine the eggs, cream, oil and extract. Stir into dry ingredients just until moistened. Fold in raspberries.












Fill 12 greased jumbo muffin cups two-thirds full, or 16 regular muffin cups. 

Or if you're like me and don't know how much one cup is by sight and add at least double the allotted amount of raspberries, 20 or so large muffins should do it. Pop a raspberry on the top for that touch of love. Bake at 400 degrees F for 22-25 minutes or until a toothpick comes out clean.






I also brought these on my first day of work, and made a good impression with them :)

Slow Cooker Pork & Black Bean Chili

4 slices of bacon cut into strips
1 lb pork, cubed (I think I used tenderloin, but the recipe called for roast)
1 onions, diced
1/2 carrot, diced
1/2 green pepper, diced
2 cloves of garlic, minced
1 tsp each of dried oregano and ground cumin
1 cans black beans, drained and rinsed
1/4 cup bottled, strained tomatoes
salt & pepper, to taste
Looks like I threw some mushrooms in too, probably because I was trying to get rid of them. But I like mushrooms, so...

Salsa:
1/4 cup chopped cherry or grape tomatoes
1/4 of a sweet yellow or orange pepper, diced
1 green onion, thinly sliced
1 tbsp lime juice

In a large skillet, cook bacon over medium heat until golden. With a slotted spoon, transfer to a paper-towel-lined plate. Discard all but 1 tbsp of the fat in the pan; brown pork in batches. Transfer bacon and pork to a slow cooker.









In the same skillet, heat oil over medium heat; cook onions, carrot, green pepper, garlic, oregano, cumin, salt & pepper until golden, about 10 minutes. Add to slow cooker. Add beans, tomatoes, and about 1-1 1/2 cups of water to slow cooker. Cover and cook on low until pork is tender, about 6-8 hours.







Salsa: In bowl, combine tomatoes, yellow pepper, onion and lime juice. Serve with chili.













This recipe I found in Canadian Living while I was waiting for the dentist, and I found it good-ish, but a little bland. I also found a recipe on the CL website for Lemon Lentil soup that was REALLY bland, so I would probably recommend against their recipes from now on.

Overall, good but I wouldn't make it again without a bunch of adjustments.

Enchiladas?

I went to a restaurant in Saskatoon and had an excellent enchilada made with cream cheese and spinach, so this is my attempt to resurrect it.

Maybe 1 cup of spinach
About the same of your choice of meat, I used shrimp
1 brick of cream cheese, softened
pepper to taste
salsa and cheese to cover them






Chop up the spinach and shrimp














Soften up the cream cheese in the microwave, and stir in the spinach, shrimp and pepper. Maybe I added some sage, too, I can't remember...












Wrap, em up and cover with salsa and cheese. Bake at 350 for 20 minutes.
This tastes a little like a mushroom cap baked with salsa and cheese. I like all those things, and I like them together.

Borscht

This one takes a bit of chopping or grating, but it's SO worth it.

1-2 beets
1 small onion
1 medium potato
1 carrot
1 celery stalk
1 cup red cabbage
2 cups vegetable stock
1 cup crushed tomatoes
2 cups water
1/2 tsp dill
1/2 tsp caraway seeds
black pepper, to taste
2-3 tbsp sugar
1-2 tbsp apple cider vinegar (I used balsamic and it was good too)

Grate all the vegetables and place them in a pot with the stock, tomatoes, water, dill, caraway seeds and pepper.
My recipe said to use a food processor to do the grating, which would probably save a lot of time, but alas... I used a little grater for most of it and just chopped up the onion and celery. It was actually kind of relaxing :)









Bring to a boil, reduce heat, cover and simmer until vegetables are very soft, about 25-40 minutes. I let this boil for about 50-60 minutes, because I am easily distracted, but you can never go wrong letting a soup meld longer than it tells you to.

Add sugar and vinegar, and simmer another 5 minutes, then taste to see if you like it, and adjust sugar and/or vinegar if you need to.








Mmm, look at that color!